* * *
Well, I watched the crucifixion. I swore that I would see this through, and I did. Jesus is lying in a tomb. How did everything go so wrong?
All I wanted was for him to take up the sword against the Romans, and to become the ruler over the Earth. He said himself that he would rule over the Earth. Perhaps, I shouldn't have been so direct, but how was I supposed to know that he would do nothing?
I have the Pharisees' silver in my hands now. Why did I accept their money? I should have known that he wouldn't have stood against them. He's the son of God, though. Didn't he want to rule over all the Earth?
No, remember how humble he kept himself? He may have done things that were agianst the laws of the Pharisees, but did he ever try to set himself up as the ruler over all? He did not have to eat with sinners and tax collectors. He did not have to come down from Heaven. Oh, what have I done? I have killed the Son of God!
But couldn't he have left whenever he wanted to? Perhaps, this was his plan all along? No, why would he plan to die?
I still have the money in my hands. What am I going to do with this cursed silver? Why had I wanted this money so much? Because I thought that I could make Jesus take up the God's sword against the Romans. Isn't that what he came down from Heaven for?
What am I going to do with this money? I'll buy something. That way, someone else will have this cursed silver.
* * *
I stand before a pair of huge golden gates. They are open, but I do not deserve to enter. I killed the Son of God. All of a sudden, I feel a hand on my shoulder.
"Judas, old friend, won't you come into my home?" Jesus said quietly.
* * *
A few days later, word reached Peter that Judas had died. He had bought a field and cast himself into it. His intestines had burst onto the field. Peter made the decision to appoint a new apostle to take Judas's place.
Author's Note: I wrote this story after a particularly inspiring religion class. I do hope you enjoyed this.
In the Gospel of St. Matthew, it's recorded that Judas flung the silver at the priests and then hung himself. However, in the Acts of the Apostles, it's recorded that Peter did receive word of Judas's death as above. I went with the version in the Acts of the Apostles, as you can see.
Also, regarding the theology of Judas entering Heaven: I do not view suicide as a sin, especially not when someone is in as much despair as Judas was. I also happen to believe that everyone will be saved in the end. How can God triumph if even one soul is consigned to Evil?